Man's Greatest Victory is the Conquest of Himself

Man’s Greatest Victory is the Conquest of Himself

How Can You Learn the Art of Daily Spiritual Renewal…when You Are Still a Prisoner of Your Past…?

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Is there such a thing as…spiritual renewal…? Of course there is. The real question is… Does it have to occur as an 8.0 magnitude earthquake, from the inside outward or the outside inward to wake you up…? Would it not be preferable to learn how to practice…spiritual renewal every moment of every day…?

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“Man’s greatest victory is the conquest of himself.” The Urantia Book, (1450.6) 131:6.2

A Difficult and Challenging Childhood…

Which of us has not had a uniquely difficult and challenging childhood to have to survive, rise above, and from which to learn lessons of life…? If you did not have such a childhood…you are most unfortunate…

My own childhood is full of experiences, both positive and negative, as well as…tragic…

I was the oldest child of five boys, and the one from whom it was ever expected to bear the burden of adult responsibilities on a farm. I was frequently whipped (sometimes until blood ran from my back and legs), until I was about fifteen and one half years of age.

I was bullied by relatives, as well as by my father and next younger brother, because I was not the rugged, kill it if it walked on four legs, heavy meat eater, like they were, and much of my extended family.

I was the only left-handed child, growing up in a world where left-handed, sensitive, artistic children did not exist…were not allowed to exist…often dying young, at the hands of a brutal parent or a sadistic relative.

And yet…I had plenty of positive, healthy experiences with horses and ponies, nature walks and trips. I always talked to the farm animals, as well as the wild life in the air and woods. I could spend time, alone, drawing and writing, daydreaming of a better future life… I did these things, in spite of the fact my artistic endeavors and sensitive nature antagonized my dad.

There is much, very much concerning which  I could have chosen to be bitter, resentful, angry and unforgiving. And for a time into my late twenties, I did hang onto these negative emotions, which nearly destroyed me, before I would fully awaken.

There is nothing, however, in my early experiences that did aught but eventually bring out the best of my true nature and personality. I knew, from a small child, my path was destined to spirituality, a close relationship with spirit, and an unbroken connection with the Universal Father of all beings in all universes…

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Broken Marriage…Broken Idealistic Dream…

My first marriage was a disastrous experience, at the time it was happening and unfolding. The separation from my spouse and two boys and subsequent divorce left me broken, aimless, my life in shambles, with broken shards of my glass house all around my feet. I gave up all of my possessions to see that my spouse and children had what they needed to survive.

I was left with one dime in my pocket, no vehicle…no material possessions except a couple of changes of clothes, the shoes on my feet, the dime in my pocket, and seemingly no meaningful future in sight…

In the following 4 years, I would wallow in self-pity, intense anger, nightmare dreams of killing the mother of my children, heavily smoking 4 to 6 packs of non filter cigarettes per day, heavily drinking both beer and whiskey, taking many drugs to dull the pain. I could so easily have ended up homeless and dead…if not physically dead…dead to the harsh realities of this life…dead in mind and spirit…

I seemed to have so much from my past weighing down on me, I no longer wanted to live… Looking back, I can see what saved me was clinging to a basic faith in the true, beautiful and good, in spite of the fact that I blamed God (as so many of us are prone to do) for all of my troubles.

One early a.m., just before dawn, I was awakened abruptly by a profound dream, in which I was walking along aimlessly through a desert. The sun had not yet come up over the sand dunes to the east, but the not yet risen sun was highlighting them. Then I became aware of the sound of a small bird and realized there were barren trees, without leaves, one after another along the route I was walking. The little songbird was in the tree closest to me. There were 11 other birds in the tree, which were not moving. The little bird was trying to get my attention. I walked on… A new tree appeared. The little bird was still there in what appeared to be the same tree with the same 11 other non-moving birds.

I bolted off my couch where I had fallen asleep in a drugged stupor from the night before. I immediately went into the bathroom and turned on the light. I looked into my face. I saw what appeared to be half of my face glowing with light. The other half was dark and evil-looking…dead… Then I immediately understood the meaning of the dream.

It was such a profound realization that I immediately forgave my spouse, forgave my dad and mom, forgave everyone I ever experienced do wrongful and evil actions to me. And lastly, I forgave myself. Then I asked God to forgive me.

I experienced an immediate outburst of tears, flowing like rivers, and felt flushed out…clean from the inside out… This was the beginning of the third great transformation inside of me.

The profound realization was and is this… We are all human. And I allowed myself to become disillusioned by the discovery I am human, an imperfect being, who has made many mistakes in his life, some with tragic consequences for others, as well as for myself. In those profound moments of realization, I could clearly see the humanness of my mom, dad, family members, my spouse, and others I had come to know, and who had often behaved toward me as far less than true friends, abandoning me in my time of greatest need for an understanding friend.

If I have one hope and desire for you, it is that you may sometime open yourself up to let the light in…to see the humanness of your dad, mom, yourself and all others around you. Do not become wholly disheartened by the deluded human actions of others, nor by your own illusions, which may still be ripping apart your heart, mind and soul.

This is why I wrote and put together the Article, entitled: Are You Unwilling to Forgive…”Inexcusable Actions…” of Others, as Well as…Your Own…? I hope you will allow the love and peace you feel coming from me, as well as the inner peace, love and light from your indwelling spirit of God to allow you to sometime forgive and forget…

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The Art of Daily Spiritual Renewal…

Not quite a year ago, I changed the name of my blog site to…From the Daily Renewing Mind of a Mortal Son of God… The reason for this change was to reflect my present daily spiritual philosophy and practice.

What stands in the way of daily spiritual renewal…?

  • Carrying the bad memories of the past around with you, as though (collectively) they are a yoke around your neck, further bound with wrist and leg irons, as well as an iron mask with the two halves bolted tightly together, so you cannot see.
  • Bad feelings in the present… Bad memories of the past are constantly bleeding into your present…preventing you from seeing anything true, beautiful and good that is going on in your present. You live your life, day to day, like a robot, a zombie, dead inside… You are not present and the present moments of your life slip away without feeling and meaning… Everything is presently…meaningless…
  • You cannot entertain a vision of your future. When you cannot create your present…you cannot create your future…

And so everything you think, speak and do is before the self-imprisoning, rolling images on the screen of your mind…a perpetually repeating movie of a broken, painful and fear-generating past, which holds it victim paralyzed and unable to experience spiritual renewal.

So here you are…carrying around all of these painful memories of the past with you, everywhere you go… And what are you doing to all of the people around you, living with you, who have to endure what you negatively erupt and spill all over everybody and everything, like a volcano spewing hot ash and lava?

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Self-therapy – The Art of Letting Go…

One of the best therapies in existence is the act of writing…for you and you alone…

There is often, at first, a disconnect between what the individual feels inside, alone with oneself and the indwelling spirit… The more you write, however, the more you are rewiring your brain to connect in an increasingly coherent expression of your true self…your soul being that you are becoming…

Start out writing your thoughts on paper. Rather than write with expectation…just write whatever thoughts come into your mind…

Keep a pad of paper and a pen near you and with you everywhere you go.

Rather than forcing yourself to write…force yourself into the habit of writing… It is this “habit of writing” that saved me from my former states of not forgiving myself…

I would write down my thoughts…expecting and intensely wanting them to be coherent…to mean something…to come poetically…to express as perfectly as I felt and saw them running through my mind… I would get frustrated when they came out as gibberish…

So I would throw them into a box. And forget about them… As I continued to write…I saw greater improvements in my ability to express myself clearly and with greater meaning…

Inevitably, I would dig back into my box of writings…and see where I was coming from and proceed to rewrite an earlier piece. That process continues on in this very moment.

This is but one form of the art of letting go of the past…rewiring your brain through daily writing…giving physical expression to the innermost and deepest feelings and thoughts which are always racing through the inner movie screen of your mind.

I will explore the art of letting go…more deeply…in another article.

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4 thoughts on “Man's Greatest Victory is the Conquest of Himself

  1. I’m Agasp! In what words would I possibly choose to express how well received your writing and wisdom are to me…To my very center in my Heart? Other than these, I know not what more to say… I So Love You, Your Heart and Your Mind and Your Soul, Namaste

    💕LOVE & LIGHT BLESSINGS, 💝NAMASTE On Jan 29, 2015 5:23 PM, “From the Daily Renewing Mind of a Mortal Son of

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, my friend, for sharing your loving sentiments here. I have a deep love for you and appreciation for what I know you are working through in your life experiences. Like you, I have worked through some very difficult, challenging and tragic experiences in my life. There are many, many times I wanted to just…give up… A deeper force of inner strength (I could barely wrap my head around at the time)…and the pleading, urging, still small whispering voice within…kept me ever close to the path I was meant to walk…never straying very far…even though the pain of the struggle was so intense that it would break me multiple times…over the decades… In the ashes of self-defeat…the real me ever arose to meet the challenges head on… I paid and am still ever paying the price of self-conquest–self-control and self-mastery… Ever let your inner light of truth so shine, my friend, that you may be the voice of truth-experience–love, light and wisdom to those around you, who, while they may seem to have more than you in physical possessions and wealth…are, in reality, starving their souls and need what only you may impart to them…a hope of greater inner truth, beauty and goodness, for which realizations within, you are paying your own price. Bountiful blessings upon you and the path you are walking, my friend, SheilahAnn 🙂

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    1. Hi Jan, your reposting of my articles has not gone unnoticed, my friend. Thank you ever so much for your efforts to spread love, truth and light to others in your own circles. I appreciate your efforts. Keep up the great work! 🙂

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